A Sundry List of Complains.

1. It's cold.
   
2. Because it's so cold, I can't wear flip flops. Ergo, I must wear shoes. The only casual shoes I have are my chuck taylors, which squeeze my toes into this little pointy mess that makes me cry within 10 minutes.
   
3. I will never be as sexy as Tom Waits.
   
4. The only food I'm really craving I can't make at home for fear of dying. (Beef Tataki)
5. Therefore I've been eating carbs. I just had a pancake, some pasta and a piece of toast for lunch.
   
6. Alphaghetti never tastes as good when your mom isn't there to tell you it's so bad.
7. I actually saw a girl this morning wearing leggings and an oversize sweater. 'Nuf said?
8. Despite Bryan painstakingly showing me how to make coffee, this morning I choked on a whole bean. I think he's doing something different when my back is turned.
   
9. I actually know when Jerry Springer is on in the afternoon. I'm a loser.
   
10. I've begun to eat my meals all stuffed into one bowl.