Friday, July 29, 2005

Who's the Fairest

I'm always surprised when I look in the mirror these days. I feel like what India has changed inside me.. should somehow be reflected on the outside. I suppose I'm lucky that it doesn't work that way, or else I'm sure I'd have grey hair and leprosy and crossed eyes for what this place does.. But I'm always.. surprised. That I don't have more wrinkles, that what I think isn't written clear across my forehead, that it doesn't look like I've been crying. I know that outwardly, I look exactly the same as I did 8 months ago. And yet somehow.. somehow I feel that inside, all my parts have been rearranged and that they must look older and tired and sad and be decorated with a lot of dirty sequins. It's precocious to tell people "I may look the same, but I'm not.". And yet that's what I think everytime I look in the mirror.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

You've changed and changed for the better, my love.

Bryan

Anonymous said...

India does change a person with it's riot of colour, poverty and heartbreaking scenes we see every day on our way to work. You are still beautiful on the outside and even more so on the inside because of this. The change you have gone through by coming to Delhi is a positive one though it may take a few months out of India to realise it. Think of all the great things you have seen, the wonderful Bryan you fell in love with, and even all the not so great scenes that will play out in your memory forever. Who else do you know that can start a sentence with "Remember the time I saw the dead guy in the market"? These are the experiences that make you the incredible woman you are. I love you and remember to cry on the outside - especially since I discovered where I hid the Kleenex! Love Mom